Weekend on the Lake

What does a hard working good looking hunky macho trucker do on his days of,,,???? He goes for a dirty weekend up on the lake with his girlfriend.... OMG who are you trying to kid,all those explitives and now you claim to have friends too..???

Any way,,,, the original plan was that my g/f and her best friend go to the lake and visit her famly that have a pontoon boat there.. So out the kindness of their hearts they let Steve and i tag along. Well they begged that we came along as we are both good looking hunky etc.. keep to the truth will you for crying out loud,,,

We bought loads of booze and really big steaks to throw onto the grill,even bought new super sexy swimm trunks... brite yellow,looks like a swimming canary.
What the girls failed to mention was that all 4 of us would share 1 double room,,so no nite of endless passion,,

We met the family,all very friendly and nice people, hitched up the boat and set forth to explore the lake,,,

Our ships captain Phil,,hey thanks bud for letting us tag along


My future mode of transport

Sunset across the lake

After sunsett fireworks on the lake,,this was magical,,with hundreds of pleasure craft all bobbing on the calm waters as above us the sky burst into a pyrotechnic ballet..






These little Chipmonks provided hours of enjoyment..

Well all good things must come to an end,and its back to work,pounding out the miles.

I am at this time in Louisville Kentucky unloading a machine in the morning,then head for Florida to offload the rest..

Welcome to Canada Steve and Harry

OMG there goes the neighberhood...Steve and Harry ( these arent their real names) arrived on the 8 of this month...and me being a really nice chap,went and met these 2 degenerates from Germany...mistake number 1
I knew my girl friend and i should have had better things to do on a sunny Winnipeg sunday,but we searched our souls and went and picked these 2 shifty yobs up at their Hotel....mistake number 2
We stuffed them into the back seat of the car,switched on the child locks and sped away before any one recognised us.. Steve being a Britt chatted non stop whilst Harry, German, sat quietly, a bit shy of using his english...We took them to the Forks.. a pretty park in town with cafes and bars, we chatted and ate a meal had a few beers....mistake number 3 ....Then took them back to their Hotel..
The following week we all chatted on msn,and decided to meet the following friday...mistake number 4,....as Louise had a single girl friend,that might like one of these two....which she did....no accounting for taste..!!!???
Well as im the only one of us who seems to work i arrived latter at the bar to find,these 2 newbies doing there best to drink Winnipeg dry and flirting badly with a Canadian lass... we all left later and had a night cap at Louises pad,where the flirting continued....badly
We arranged to go to the Morris Stampede, the following day...which we all thoughly enjoyed.....the poor flirting continued,,,
And the girls out of the goodness of their hearts, decided to help the 2 poor misfits with furniture and house hold goods to help set up home together,as they now had a flat and not one piece of furniture....mistake number ,,,oh whos counting any way
Well the 2 retards took and ,well i wont say they failed there Class1 tests..!! but they didnt pass either...ooops ....but the flirting has improved .. ???? Rumour has it a kiss took place and hands have been held..???
We are all going upto the lake over the long weekend, i hope by then they will have both passed their tests and begin driving as a team for Trans X.....earning the big bucks,,coz they will be paying for a slap up meal for my girl friend and i...

Welcome to Canada Steve and Harry

Not so easy Where am i Quiz

Yeah i know others do this on their Bloggs to,,but Lyndons are so easy,,so try finding out where i took these pics,,?????



Try boarding this casino

Flippers City ??????

Now this is tooooooooooooooo easy



As is this one,,,!!!!!!

No where near the coast here...??????
Going to a large Port...but which one ?????
Bush must love having this building here
If in doubt add an axel,,at which Border Xing tho

Only For Realy Clever People..????

Only great minds can read this....... fi yuo cna..Olny 55 ploepe out of 100 can,i cdnuolt blveiee taht i cloud aulactly uesdnatnrd waht i was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid,aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,it dseno,t mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are,the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the fsrit and the lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,but the wrod as a wlohe...
Azanmig huh ??? yaeh and i awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorant !!!!!!!

Now laugh at my bad spelling

Reflections...1 year in Canada

Well ive been here almost a year,and its time to take stock.
Life has been pretty good thus far,seen some great things,been to some amazing places,and heard some wierd things..?????
You may have seen and read of some of my exploits,but some of the things ive heard here,well they take my breath away at times.
1) Met 2 young guys in kentucky with whome i shared a beer or 3.!!!!
the first asked where my accent came from,and before i could reply his buddy chimed in and stated " hes european,they all sound the same ""
he was under the impression that Europe is a country in its self ????
2) Whilst sat in a truck stop waiting for my order to arrive,the waitress asked "" how was every thing "" meaning is the food good or not,,,????????
3) An old timer in Alabama suggested i try the apple pie " its the best in the whole godamm world here "" when i asked him if he had tried apple pie in france or Italy or any where else for that matter,he admited he had never been more that 60 miles from his home town,,he was 78 years old,,????
4) The menu at the TA truck stop said " Al dente pasta with a beef and mushroom sauce " yummy thought i .and boldly orderd... what came was infact a not bad beef stew with mushrooms in a thick brown sauce,which coverd the sogiest tastless pasta Butterflies i,d ever put in my mouth...I called for the chef,,a spotty teanager arrived..??? " Whats wrong?" acne face asked,, " The pasta," i said " they should be al dente" "well " he replied " we,ve only got those Butterfly pasta,s , no al dente ones "..??????????

The average American will gladly inform you of how "Great" thier country is,but as only 2% of all americans hold a passport,they have nothing to compare it with. A vast majority take their guns to work with them, ??? why ?? because they feel safer !!!!! There is a major court case going on right now because the workers at Disney World in Orlando FL arent allowed too,.

Things here are a lot different than Europe,and i,m having great fun finding new things daily.
But they do talk a load of crap at times...

Eating in North America

OMG .... This is a sour subject with me..i love food,but good food..
to get good food in Canada or America you have to pay a fortune or cook it your self,,
or you like me will be dissapointed at every meal.

1)Breakfasts,well theyve got those of pretty good,except for the bacon. It will arrive on ya plate no matter how many times you ask for soft bacon,soooooooooooo crispy that if dropped from 6 inches it will shatter both the plate and its self

2)I like a steak rare,,very bloody rare.. it has been known for me to refuse 3 steaks till i get it rare,which doesnt go down to well with the kitchen staff...!!!!!

3)Salads.... a good fresh salad can be had almost any where,the problem are the bland tastless dressings that add 10,000 callories to the meal. Olive oil is only known as popeyes gal friend and not as an ingrediant to a salad sauce..????

4) Cheases,,, sniff ..sniff,, dont exsist...oh youll get a square piece of tastless orange or beige cardboard that the menu describes as "Swiss" or "Cheader" but thats it as far as chease culture goes

Water,,the beauty and the beast !!!

These are some views and images of water in its many forms,,, some beautiful , some impressive, some ugly,,!!!!!

Prairie storms,

The wonderful Rockies

The Frassure Canyon,,from Cache Creek to Hope in BC.

The Floods of the mid-west

Is A Truck A Living Thing ???

Why should i pose such a deep and meeningful qustion,when most of what i write is utter drivel???
Well i think my truck has its own Spirit,,,off course it does you bimbo,you drive for Spirit..!!!
Thats not what i ment,i think my truck has its own Spirit and a will of its own......
Why ????
Last sunday whilst emptying my pretty beast i lost my cell phone,,no ,i should rephrase that, my truck ate my cell phone ????
She gobbled it up and did her darndest not to let me have it back...
After 20mins of searching my cell was located in the front heater vent,tucked deep in the bowels of dash board,,???
So with lots of cursing and cussing,the only way to retrieve my phone was to dismantle just about everything,to drill holes in the heating ducts,pass bent wire coat hangers through and hope and pray that my cell would pop out at some time...
5 hours latter,it popped out,,my trucks now resembled a sieve,, with bits missing..
Why would my truck be so nasty to me,,??? maybe coz i call her names,and dont get on to well with her,, hell knows no fury like a woman scorned,, so i'll try and be really nice to her,and maybe she wont eat my things....

Cross Country Ramblings

Partof myload,,a tridem trailer bound for a marina in Clinton CN

Took my first load cross country,heading east,not going via the US but taking the shorter route through Ontario...Ive been to Toronto before and was not to impressed,so expected no great things of the rest of Ontario,,,,,Ooops

How wrong could i have been..??? its just sooooooo pretty..

There is just one pretty lake after another intersperrsed with pine forests,,long empty highways with bouncing Bambis and bears,,yes a real life Yogi galloped in front of me,all big brown and fluffy,,so cute !!!!!

Stopped ot a local hostelry,that was most friendly and very accomodating,so much so i was allowed to lick a one of the chicks there ????????

See,,me licking a chick on a stick

Its a long drive going this way using the trans canada,speed limits are strictly enforced,and its all only 2 lane,but i still made good time and crossed into the states at the cornwall border,,,

Once into the US i went to bed,,up early tho 3am to run down thru New York state then New Hampshire,into a load of false teeth ???? Mass o chew sets ??? made a quick delivery just south of Boston,,then stopped for tea. We are so civilized here .. Called my customer in Clinton CN,who gave a few tips on how best to drive to his marina,and arrived there safe and dry to unload straight off,,

It was so nice to deliver to a customer that was not only friendly but allso had respect for a driver,i was offerd pizza and use of the showers and phone without even asking,,,10 points for those guys...

Empty,i called in for my reload,which was in Willmington in Delaware,that happens to be south of New York City,,,oh bugger.

There is no good way to navigate through NYC,only less yucky ways..so i implemented plan B, which was to go to bed....then leave at 3am and blast through the middle when there would be slightly less traffic..

My master plan paid of well and arrived at my pick up point in good time,,,10 points for me!!

Once loaded,my brain when into happy mode,after having been out for 3 weeks i was going home,,and 4 days off to ,1 cut my lawn ,which was now 16inches tall...2 pay my bills..3 do my washing 4 do some shopping,,5 do some women ???? 6 have a bloody well erned rest 7 write up my blog,,,

Well ive done most of the above,,not telling which are still pending..

A 2 Week Epic ????

Dear reader,

This is going to be a loooooooooooooong post,so i suggest you get some snacks and beers in at the outset,,,,,

The journey began pretty much as normal,,,,,there's nothing normal with you...!!!!
Load machines for Florida,,that changed 10 mins after i arrived.
The importers had realised that most of the shipment was destined for Salt Lake City Utah, so i should deliver there and not in Orlando..

Ok plan B... Crossed into the US and headed west, not south and east.Spent the nite in Fargo then crossed North Dakota,into Montana,where i passed a sleeping Ken (fellow Spirit driver) sent him a text to let him know id be in Billings FJ that nite,,

The next day 2 Spirits set off serching for Yogi bear in the Yellowstone Park ???? tried this before in the winter,,it hadn't occured to me that he would be hibernating..

2 very pretty Spirit trucks not working but enjoying the mountain air...dont tell the boss tho

Just off to the right behind the last tree,you may just see Yogi,,,

As ive mentioned before,Ken moaned coz i dont have a CB,,so we shant repeat that bit...

Its just so pretty up here,and we made great progress,,,mine quicker than Kens,,the old slow coach..

Well we trundled on farther south,down off the Rockies and onto Hwy 15,just north of SLC,we parted company as Ken was headed to Fresno Ca.

I was way a head of time,and decided to call the customer to see if i could unload a day early,which i did..luckely for me.

I informed Scott my boss,,not so lucky for me..

He had a reload in the pipe line, and would send details shortly ????

So i headed for the showers as it was really hot and sticky,

The text message said ,, reload in Nogales on the Mexican border Water Melons for Calgary..

It was at this point that i thought Scott was bonkers ..!!! so i phoned in and reminded him that i have an open flat deck trailer and not a reffer,and that i was 850 miles from Nogales..

No problem he says, the customer knows that and has agreed to it ???????

I had to remind myself to breath,,, load 57 pallets of water melons..on a flat trailer...all in cardboard boxes...from Mexico to calgary,,Oh what fun.!!!

Running the Canyons

I headed 2 hours farther south of Salt Lake,then cut acroos to Hwy 89,,on the map it looked like a good route,,,and it was.

Sorry if the quality is not upto Spielburg standards,but driving a 72ft semi down a narrow canyon whilst drinkin a coffee,eating a burger,texting a friend on the cell,smoking a cigi and filming aint easy....Gremmie the multi tasking expert,,

Life on Mars

Yes there is life on Mars ??? yes coz i was there,,???

Driving across the Red Planet is a bit wierd tho..!!!!! And yes if you listen carefully that was my cell phone going cling cling

It was ashame that the weather wasnt so good,but the landscape was amaizing,crossing the Navarjo nations lands down towards the Grand Canyon

I arrived in Nogales late evening had a Mexican supper,then sat on the loo for an hour,,,,to much info here,please dont elaborate...!!!!

The way of life down here moves in sloooooooooow motion,the simple act of booking in to load is a major diplomatic procedure,conducted in a multitude of langauges,none of which resemble english

But with hands and feet, and a big cheesy smile they agreed to load right away,,,right away in mexican meens sometime today

Once loaded all i had to do was put my tarps on,as luck would have it a dust storm blew in, which made the job so much easier

The finneshed product..

I left Nogales hot and sweaty and coverd in dust,, the next truck stop is only 100 miles away in Casa Grande AZ, so thats were i headed A.S.A.P, driving past Tuscon ive tried to photograph the sand storms,the sky isn't grey just dusty ????

At this point i think we should all take a break,,my fingers are going to sleep...

So fingers well rested let us continue,,,,

Spent the nite in casa Grande,twidled arround on the internet,and got wet ???? my truck leaks....which reminds me i should go for a pee..

The story of the leaking cab i have allready documented..

up early the next day and headed for Calgary,time was not of the essence so i enjoyed the views..

Passing through Flagstaff Az some thing wierd happend ???

It snowed..???? Now hold on a bit,yesterday was 35c warm and windy,,follwed by a tropical rain storm,,and now snow ????

Oh well, cant change the weather,so onwards and upwards to Calgary,driving through Mars again,,,

On route to Calgary i made a quick lunch stop at Lyndons,and enjoyed his hospitallity and great food,,

My drop in Calgary was a midnite book in,, so after a quick nap in the early evening i handed my papers to the goods in girl,who took great delight in telling me that they have no space for my melons and that i will have to come back in 24hrs...!!!!

But super gremmie had allready anticipated this and had removed his tarps and straps,and as it was about to Pee down,she had no other choice than to unload and double quick..

Once empty,it was bed time for teddy bears,,,,!!

The next morn after a quick chat with Scott,i headed east from Calgary to pick up a load of tooth picks for Wyoming..?????

Ok so they are telegraph poles,but a giant would use them as tooth pics....

The trip down was dogged by breakdowns,but i did at long last arrive to unload,then head across state to the town of Grey Bull up in the mountains,,then home sweet home..